Mama's Call

Mornings come fresh, crisp and dark before the sun rises over the ridge.  It is my time set aside to meet Jesus.  We have a standing date.

Today, our date lasted longer than usual at the table because the room is crowded with thoughts and hopes, fears and joys we wade through together.

As thoughts have paused, my soul is silent - waiting - asking what do I do.  That is when Mama called.

"Hi Mama," I said soft and slow.

Her happy voice enters my room, "You are either worn out or something is going on.  Your tone is saying something!"  From 800 miles away she knows.  She shares, "Well, I was reading the Word and the Lord nudged me.  He said to call and share two verses with you.  So, before you tell me what is going on, hear what He has for you:

And your ears will hear a word behind you,

"This is the way, walk in it."

Whenever you turn to the right or to the left.

Isaiah 30:21

His Sword struck deeply.

"Angie?  Are you there?"

"Yes, ma'am," whispers out as He reminds me:  Listen.

"Okay," she continues happily, "Well, I have one more in Isaiah for you:

Thus says the LORD,

the Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:

I am the LORD your God,

who teaches you to profit,

who leads you in the way you should go.

Isaiah 48:17

Mama hasn't been to my home in 6 months.  She doesn't know my bathroom mirror carries an acrostic to keep me from gaining confidence or worth or support through anything other than my God.  It says:

                             W  Worship

                             O   only

                             R   Redeemer

                             T   the

                             H   Holy

Redeemer, the Holy,
     You are sending the warmth of You into crevices to melt the coverage that hides.  This is Your way: bringing life from the hidden places.

Mama's voice breaks through again, "Honey, the next verse is written in past tense to the children of Israel, but it seems that you are supposed to hear it present tense.  So, as I read it, I am changing the verbs:

Oh, that you pay attention to My commandments! . . .

Isaiah 48:18

"I am scared, Mama, and excited."  And her voice comes back encouraging.

"Can I do this?" begins the thoughts flying around of goodness and joy being tossed and blown by lies that destroy and paralyze, rending uselessness.

I run to Him for soul rest . . . and He reminds me . . . He is LORD and I follow.

Mama reminds me, too, He has created us for His purposes.  In that purpose will be His rest.


Lord, help us stand in Your purposes.  
Love always,
Angie

Most of us grew up in homes where we were taught to study hard in school and in college so we could get a good job and make lots of money and live in a big house, drive a nice car, and enjoy great vacations.  When you ask a child what they want to be when they grow up, the answers generally reflect that influence.  But no one ever says, "When I grow up, I want to be a slave."  But that is what the Bible calls us to.  The Bible would teach that the highest calling for you is to be a slave who denies himself and follows Jesus.

Kyle Idleman, Not a Fan, pg.150.

His Way

There is cold cleanness to new fallen snow.
Pristine crystal coverage that draws the eye as the sun passes over.
Frozen perfection as a surface crust forms.

And time passes.

Then something happens.  Foot-falls break the crusty illusion of coverage to expose life hidden.  A road opens.  Sun shines.  Moisture seeps into frozen crevices breaking and softening the pristine coverage.  Earth is churned as more foot-falls arrive and more snow melts.

From this ground, warmed and watered and churned, comes life from the hidden places, in His time.

Father, there is cold comfort staying in hidden places, where life seems clean as new fallen snow.  But You have made us to live in the light of Your Son.  As I turn toward the heat of His face, mud is on mine.  

I am scared.  And my first response is to hide, again.  

And He said to me, 

"My grace is sufficient for you,

for power is perfected in weakness."

2 Corinthians 12:9

How blessed is the man  . . .  

whose delight is in the law of the LORD, . . .

He is like a tree planted by streams of water,

which yields its fruit in season

and whose leaf does not wither.

Psalm 1:1-3

And Your grace rains down.  Washing me white as snow.  

For by grace you have been saved through faith. 

It is the gift of God . . . 

We are His workmanship,

created in Christ Jesus for good works,

which God prepared beforehand,

that we should walk in them.

Ephesians 2:8-10

Father, thank You for the heat 
     that melts the snows 
          that water the seeds 
               that grow toward Your Light. 
Help me walk, broken and softened and alive.

Love always,
Angie

Holy-days

You will not do any ordinary work.
       You are to be before the Lord. Focused on Him.  Celebrate Him.
            You will gather with other believers. . .

His Words repeated over and over through Leviticus 23 as the festivals were laid out before the Israelites . . . fill me with joy. . . God teaching His people to celebrate.

And we celebrated.

Even as Christmas decorations are packed away for another year, reverberations of celebration continue in my heart.  And my heart smiles.


Father, thank You for sending Your Son, Jesus.  
     We celebrated by stopping our ordinary work.  
          We celebrated Him in our hearts and in our homes. 
               And we gathered. . .   


Thank You for the joy that grows and fills and overflows into color and laughter and food, crafts and children and ordinary lives.  Your precious Gift remembered.  


May celebration echo in your heart for days.
Love always,
Angie

The God-setting-things-right that we read about 

has become Jesus-setting-things-right for us. 

And not only for us, but for everyone who believes in him. 

For there is no difference between us and them in this. 

Since we've compiled this long and sorry record as sinners (both us and them) 

and proved that we are utterly incapable of living 
the glorious lives God wills for us, 

God did it for us. 

Out of sheer generosity he put us in right standing with himself. 

A pure gift. 

He got us out of the mess we're in 

and restored us to where he always wanted us to be. 

And he did it by means of 

Jesus Christ.

The Message, Romans 8:22-24

Banqueting Table

We come together to cook, to visit, and to eat.
Then, we stay to share, the sharing of God at work in our lives.  And the children say Jesus their own way.

Holidays are satisfying as holy days.  Days set apart for celebrating our Lord.  The Messiah.  The Baby who is the Lamb of God.  The Bread of Life.  The Living Water.

May your celebrations be a feast of Him.
Love always,
Angie

When You Know They Know

Our children will return from college for their Christmas break.  They enter home to sleep, be fed, and be heard.  Father, that is home . . . entering into Your place of peace to rest, be fed, and be heard.  

Our daughter shared a written moment before arriving home. A tender moment of Truth bubbling out of her.  And it let our hearts know that she knows.  She knows where guidance can be found.  And she wrote:

I flopped onto the bed with a sigh.

At last I had been given some free time for a few hours. I had been up the night before with Joseph, who had a horrible cough, and we were both exhausted, but that little two-year-old has two naps a day and if I am lucky I get a quick power nap. 

I lay there trying with all my might to fall asleep, but two things were stopping me: the incessant crying and whining that was going on upstairs and the Still-Small-Voice in my head telling me to go the extra mile.

I curled tighter, determined to make-up the hours of lost sleep. 

Choose this day whom you serve, Hannah.

The battle inside my mind began in earnest. Lord, she told me I could rest. I don't need to go up there right now.

Who is giving her a chance to rest? She was up last night too.

But she is the mom. She is used to being this tired all the time and I was up more than she was. 

Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourself. 

I sat up grumpily. Fine, Lord. I'm going. 

Do all things without grumbling...

Isn't it enough that I going up there to help her? Why do you care if I'm cheerful about it or not? 

Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father.

God, I'm too tired to be thankful and cheerful. Can you hear the kids up there? At least two of them are crying the other one is whining. God I can't do it! I'm worn out and emotionally empty.

My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.

I walked up stairs and into the chaos of life holding tightly to His Word. I knew that if I let go of Him, I would fall. 

Father, at the end of the day when all is said and done, I just want to know that our children have the tools to live this life. That they have You . . . or maybe it is knowing that You have them first. . . in the palm of Your hand.  And, Father, thank You for the reminders that you give me, too.  You are the One who holds onto me.


May you know He is the One holding onto you.  And there find rest and sustenance and a listening ear.
Love always,
Angie

Tradition

The beauty of the day is wrapped in tradition.

Bundled against the cold with a saw and tape measure in hand we hike through the woods with all the kids.  Finding the perfect tree.  Coming back to the warm fire. Visiting with family and friends.

This is how we begin our advent season together.

And we remember His birth with joy and hot cocoa!  The coming of His birth broke 400 years of silence.  And we celebrate the breaking of the silence, it is tradition

The snow coated woods were quiet this year, but not us!  Running footsteps and wonderful squeals of delight danced through the trees.  His children celebrating with hearts joy-filled for the season ahead, a season of remembering the life given to us through His coming.

            God writes the gospel not in the Bible alone,

             but on trees and flowers and clouds and stars."            -Martin Luther


And on snow covered peaks and cooking fires and His children's hearts.
During this advent season, may you remember with joy His coming.
Love always,
Angie

           Friends, we need to stop living selfish lives, forgetful of our God.  
           Our lives here are short, often unexpectedly so, 
           and we can all stand to be reminded of it from time to time. . . 
           Don't let yourself forget.  
           Soak it in and keep remembering that it is true.  
           He is everything.                                                            -Francis Chan, Crazy Love, pg. 51

Desserts

Dessert.

Beautifully inviting and lovingly made extras.  That is dessert.

It's not necessary for survival, just . . . special.

His desserts are extra special . . . because we are loved so dearly that He not only offers Bread of Life, but gives us access to His kingdom.  He pardoned our sins and then gave us dessert!

O taste and see that the Lord is good;

How blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!   

Psalm 34:8

The kingdom of God is dessert.  Walking in the blessings of knowing Him, coming to Him as a trusting child, and tasting His goodness.

And Jesus said to them (His disciples), 

"To you has been given the secret of the kingdom of God . . ."

Mark 4:11

Heavenly Father, what are my desserts today?

          Smells of a hot breakfast on a below zero morning . . .

          Warmth of a fire in the wood burner . . .

          Noticing the pretty little chick-a-dee on the bird feeder . . .
          A florescent pink sun rise . . .
          Sounds of laughter around our table . . .
          Joy-krinkles around the eyes of my husband . . .
          Giggles from visiting cookie decorators . . .
          Phone calls from our gone-away children . . .
          Old friends sharing around our table . . .
          Dishwashers . . .
          Snow blowing like crystals in the wind . . .
          Scarf and mittens made by Cora . . .
          Smells of chili cooking on the stove top . . .
          Flannel shirts . . .
          Candles on the table . . .
          Mama reminding me of God's goodness right where I am . . .

And I begin to feel stuffed with the desserts of His kingdom.  

May you enjoy many desserts this season!

Love always,

Angie

Courage

It makes it's debut only after fear has raised it's controlling head.

The lack of courage keeps me from walking the path God lays in front of me.  If I think,  "I can not 'conquer' the assignment, the task, the adventure, then why continue to try?  What does it matter anyway?"

That is the thought that paralyzes because I forget . . .

Have I not commanded you?

Be strong and courageous!

Do not tremble or be dismayed,

for the Lord your God is with you 

wherever you go.    Joshua 1:9

And this is why it matters.  Soul-peace follows obedience.  Courage obeys with trust as its fuel.

In the past 7 weeks, thoughts have been embraced that eat away at the foundations of who God made me to be, a vessel of His glory.  I hide and run away in my dark quiet, all the while wanting the freshness of His light.

And God reminds, "Have I not commanded you?"

Yes.

May obedience bring Him glory.
Love always,
Angie

Men are never duly touched and impressed with a conviction

of their significance,

until they have contrasted themselves 

with the majesty of God.

R. C. Sproul

P.S.  There will be several blogs close together because I have written and not finished because of embracing lies.  I am "stepping past" the lies and walking in obedience . . . because He said to.   : >

Anticipation

God is the beginning.  

In the beginning, God creates.  God sets His people apart.  God calls them to Himself and leads them out of slavery.  He sets a standard, building His culture.  He provides, protects, and blesses.

In response, His people rebel.  

God calls them back.  

They rebel again.  And again.  And again.  

He calls them back 

     again . . . 

          and again . . . 

               and again . . . until His is silent.  

And God is in the middle.

After spending 9 months reading the Old Testament, my soul groans.  Groans for the rebellious to repent, to turn around.  And I anticipate the birth of Help.  

At the end of the Old Testament, I spend a weekend without reading, staying in His silence.  Silence reminds my soul I have an old testament, too.  

And I hold my breath with anticipation.

The page turns to reveal the Word became flesh and dwelt among us.  And my lungs fill with His holy presence.    John 1:14

He is Light, His name is the color of joy, and in Him there is no darkness at all.  1 John 1:5

Instead of silence, the heavenly host praises God.  Luke 2:13-14

As I read on, I know God will be the ending, also.  

This year, a friend and I are reading through the Word chronologically.  It has been an unforgettable journey of discovery and remembrance.  

Remembering the stories of His people and His faithfulness and His lovingkindness.

Discovering how much I desire for the Father, Jesus, and the Spirit to be the main character in my life and in the lives of others. 

Come read with us.  We are reading through the Bible in a year using this link: http://www.oneyearbibleonline.com/oneyearweeklychrono.php

  

Love always,

Angie

The Wheat and the Weeds

Their roots are spreading, our children who stand so straight and tall.  They come together occasionally to share their stories, then head back to where the stories happen, planted and growing among weeds.  The wheat and the weeds. . .

Father, My heart's desire is that our seed would be with Your Seed.  When the weeds come into their lives, I want to clean them out so that our seed would grow strong and true. 


The servants ask the Owner of the field, "Where then did the weeds come from?  
"An enemy did this," He replies.


Can I pull weeds?


"No," He answers, "because while you are pulling the weeds, you may up root the wheat.  Let both grow together until the harvest. . . . at that time, I will direct the harvesters:  first collect weeds, tie into bundles, and burn them.  Then, gather the wheat and bring it into My barn."  


I sometimes try to pull weeds all by myself and it makes a mess.  I try to clean up messes.  And I hear You tell me to be still.  Father, it takes courage to be still.  

Jesus is my courage.  

Trusting Him to direct the harvest is my place.  

I watch, praying while waiting. . . 

Praying for His bountiful harvest in your lives, too.  (Matthew 13:24-30)
Love always,
Angie

Following Him

Mornings come fresh, crisp and dark before the sun rises over the ridge.  It is my time set aside to meet Jesus.  We have a standing date.

Today, our date lasted longer than usual at the table because the room is crowded with thoughts and hopes, fears and joys we wade through together.

As thoughts have paused, my soul is silent - waiting - asking what do I do.  That is when Mama called.

"Hi Mama," I said soft and slow.

Her happy voice enters my room, "You are either worn out or something is going on.  Your tone is saying something!"  From 800 miles away she knows.  She shares, "Well, I was reading the Word and the Lord nudged me.  He said to call and share two verses with you.  So, before you tell me what is going on, hear what He has for you:

And your ears will hear a word behind you,

"This is the way, walk in it."

Whenever you turn to the right or to the left.

Isaiah 30:21

His Sword struck deeply.

"Angie?  Are you there?"

"Yes, ma'am," whispers out as He reminds me:  Listen.

"Okay," she continues happily, "Well, I have one more in Isaiah for you:

Thus says the LORD,

the Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:

I am the LORD your God,

who teaches you to profit,

who leads you in the way you should go.

Isaiah 48:17

Mama hasn't been to my home in 6 months.  She doesn't know my bathroom mirror carries an acrostic to keep me from gaining confidence or worth or support through anything other than my God.  It says:

                             W  Worship

                             O   only

                             R   Redeemer

                             T   the

                             H   Holy

Redeemer, the Holy,
     You are sending the warmth of You into crevices to melt the coverage that hides.  This is Your way: bringing life from the hidden places.

Mama's voice breaks through again, "Honey, the next verse is written in past tense to the children of Israel, but it seems that you are supposed to hear it present tense.  So, as I read it, I am changing the verbs:

Oh, that you pay attention to My commandments! . . .

Isaiah 48:18

"I am scared, Mama, and excited."  And her voice comes back encouraging.

"Can I do this?" begins the thoughts flying around of goodness and joy being tossed and blown by lies that destroy and paralyze, rending uselessness.

I run to Him for soul rest . . . and He reminds me . . . He is LORD and I follow.

Mama reminds me, too, He has created us for His purposes.  She says He made me His messenger.  That is all.  Just a messenger.  But, in that purpose will be His rest.


Lord, help us stand in Your purposes.  
Love always,
Angie

Most of us grew up in homes where we were taught to study hard in school and in college so we could get a good job and make lots of money and live in a big house, drive a nice car, and enjoyu great vacations.  When you ask a child what they want to be when they grow up, the answers generally reflect that influence.  But no one ever says, "When I grow up, I want to be a slave."  But that is what the Bible calls us to.  The Bible would teach that the highest calling for you is to be a slave who denies himself and follows Jesus.

Kyle Idleman, Not a Fan, pg.150.

Clouds and Storms

Clouds are interesting.  They can not be held, but they produce rain to quench the thirst of the earth. They roar with thunder or silently float past.  They give shade and they pitch hailstones.  

Lately, I have photographed clouds as I am wanting to look up.  Our God has chosen to use clouds as a vehicle for Himself between heaven and earth.  Displayed in them is His power and beauty.  

Another element to clouds is the storms they bring.  In our valley, there is a storm not in the skies.  Storm clouds hang over thoughts and heart ache, over many prayers while kneeling before God's will.




A friend reminded me of this song, Praise You in this Storm.    http://youtu.be/Yr7i5L6kFT0  Please listen to it.

The story he shares before singing the song is the same kind of storm leaving tears in our little mountain valley for a young girl in our community. . .

Still, there is hope.  It is this, God is riding the storm with her. . .


As you pause to watch the clouds, may you praise Him in the storms in your life.
Love always,
Angie





This hope we have as an anchor of the soul, 
a hope both sure and steadfast 
and one which enters within the veil, 
where Jesus has entered as a forerunner . . . Hebrews 6:19


Ways God has used clouds as His vehicle . . .

For His Signs:

He set the sign of His first covenant in the clouds as a rainbow.  Genesis 9:12-13

Leading and protecting:  

He led the Israelites by day with a cloud.  When this cloud settled on the tent of meeting, God spoke with Moses.  When the cloud moved, the people of God moved.  Exodus 13:21-22

Speaking:

Peter, James, and John heard the voice of the Lord from a cloud as they watched the body of their friend, Jesus, transformed before their very eyes!  Mark 9:2-8

Transportation of Jesus, our Savior:

After Jesus had been crucified, he appeared several times before people.  Then, He was lifted into the air while the apostles watched.  It was a cloud that received Jesus out of their sight.  Acts 1:9

And when Jesus returns, it will be in the clouds with great power and glory.  Mark 13:24-27

Experiencing Him

Rain runs cold down my bare legs.  Joy in my heart keeps me warm.  We hike the shiny-wet trail leading us to our campsite, some 3 miles ahead.

Up.  We are hiking into a basin to camp at tree line for the night. And the rain pools in my boots, creating a hidden puddle under my wool sock.  A wet smile spreads across my chilled face.  The puddle squishes rhythmically as I keep pace with the others and focus on anything other than wet and cold.

We each encourage.  No one complains.  All are cold, tired, hungry, and drenched.  Still, no one complains.  Experience has taught this: it is better to focus on one another when comfort is lacking.  And we hike and we visit and we go beyond our physical circumstances.  We connect.  Uninterrupted.

Night brings rest and morning brings glorious sunshine!  Spirits rise as we begin hiking to the summit of a 14,000 foot peak.  The experience of standing on top is awe inspiring.  To see the majesty of the earth and the skies is enlightening.  It reminds me that I am small.  There is a much bigger picture than my reality of daily living.  And words catch in my throat as I try to tell my God, the Creator, "Thank You."

He reminds me this is His footstool.

"Heaven is My throne,

And the earth is My footstool.

Where then is a house you could build for Me?

And where is a place that I may rest?

For My hand made all these things,

Thus all these things came into being," declares the LORD.

"But to this one I will look,

To him who is humble and contrite of spirit,

And who trembles at My word."

Isaiah 66:1-2

And we are the sheep of His pasture.

Come, let us worship and bow down;

Let us kneel before the LORD our Maker.

He is our God, and we are the people of His pasture,

And the sheep of His hand.

Psalm 95:6-7

And He is in the valley.

The LORD is my Shepherd, . . .

He makes me lie down . . .

He leads me . . . 

He restores my soul . . .  

He guides me . . . for His name's sake.

Even though I walk through the valley . . . 

  He is with me.

My cup overflows.

Goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life,

And I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Psalm 23

May you experience Him.

Love always,

Angie

Love in the Ripples

We are stretched-out in the den.  It is too early to go to bed and too late to start something new: "hang time."  And so, we visit.

Her heart is in her eyes as she shares some of her dreams of travel.  Toes wiggle as she shares her favorite dreams and squirms in delight as thoughts take shape into words and words form into possible plans.  

At an inappropriate moment according to her unspoken gauge, I correct my daughter.  And the visiting stops abruptly.  The action speaks louder than words.  I corrected.  She rejected it.

And the strange thing is that I felt robbed of our mother-daughter intimacy!  I wonder if I have made a mistake: Why couldn't I have waited to bring that topic up?  Why do I always have to teach and correct?  Why can't I just listen?  

Like that stone being thrown into a peaceful pond, ripples spread again.  And the ripples become a wake pushing us apart.  If only she knew my heart. . .

Father, Do You ever feel that way when our relationship is moving comfortably along and You open my eyes to ways I move away from You, doing my own thing?  I sometimes walk away from our intimacy by the momentary rejection Your teaching, not welcoming the correction.  

My daughter, I understand.  I do it because, "When I fed (you), (you) were satisfied; when (you) were satisfied, you became proud; then (you) forgot Me." (Hosea 13:6)  

Ouch.  
At first, it feels like You cause ripples in my plans just because You want to.  But, I have known You long enough to embrace the fact that You love me by teaching me in the dailiness of life and if I harden my heart against You, more trouble will come.  How blessed is the man who fears always, but he who hardens his heart will fall into calamity.  (Proverb 28:14)  Thank You for teaching me. 

And quietly a Psalm comes to mind:  Oh give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; for His lovingkindness is everlasting.  Let the redeemed of the Lord say so . . . (Psalm 107:1-2a)  

And a reminder from our Lord comes to mind:  My son, do not reject the discipline of the Lord, or loathe His reproof, for whom the Lord loves He reproves, even as a father, the son in whom he delights.  (Proverb 3:11-12)

And there is Love in the ripples.
Love always,
Angie